A SOUL STILL BECOMING
A Story of Imperfections, Faith, and Finding Oneself
Some mornings begin with hope. Others begin with the quiet weight of everything we believe we should have become by now.
Inara was learning that life did not always move according to the plans we made for it.
Her alarm rang before sunrise. She opened her eyes, reached for her phone, and turned it off. The house was still asleep. She performed wudu, spread her prayer mat, and stood for Fajr.
After prayer, she remained seated, her hands raised in dua.
“Ya Allah, make me better than I was yesterday. Give me patience with myself, kindness towards others, and the strength to correct what I cannot change overnight.”
She lowered her hands and smiled faintly.
Some prayers were not about asking for something new. Sometimes, they were simply about learning to appreciate what Allah had already given.
By the time she returned to her room, Noor was standing at the doorway.
“Are you still choosing what to wear?”
Inara looked at the two dresses lying on her bed.
“I am deciding.”
“You have been deciding since the last century.”
Inara laughed. “You could help instead of making fun of me.”
Noor picked up one of the dresses and handed it to her.
“Here. Now stop negotiating with your wardrobe.”
Their laughter filled the room.
Inara loved these ordinary moments. She often wondered whether people truly understood the value of familiar voices, playful arguments, and the comfort of having someone nearby without needing a reason.
Perhaps happiness was not always something extraordinary. Sometimes, it was simply having people whose presence made an ordinary morning feel complete.
---
Later that morning, Inara sat near her study table. Her Master's books were arranged on one side, while a notebook filled with unfinished thoughts lay on the other.
She looked at her qualifications and remembered the girl who had once imagined what life would look like after completing her education.
She had expected confidence, independence, and a clearer direction.
But life had introduced her to questions she had never prepared herself to answer.
Had she used her abilities well enough? Was she doing enough? Was she becoming the person she had promised herself she would be?
She was grateful for her education, yet sometimes disappointed with herself.
It was a strange feeling: to appreciate your journey and still wish you had done certain things differently.
She opened her notebook and wrote:
“Sometimes, our greatest disappointment is not what life takes away from us, but what we believe we have failed to become.”
She paused.
Perhaps she had been too hard on herself. She remembered every unfinished plan more clearly than the little things she had accomplished. She noticed her mistakes more quickly than her efforts.
She could forgive others for being imperfect, yet struggled to offer herself the same kindness.
How easily human beings became judges of their own lives.
“We spend so much time noticing the cracks in ourselves that we forget even imperfect things can hold beauty.”
She closed the notebook.
For the first time that morning, she did not feel the need to correct every thought.
---
In the afternoon, she sat with her family. Conversations moved from ordinary household matters to future plans. Someone asked about her goals, and she answered with a smile.
She had many.
She wanted to work, write, learn, and make her parents proud. She wanted her education to become more than a collection of certificates. She wanted to create something meaningful with the opportunities she had received.
Yet she knew that wanting something and working consistently towards it were two different things.
She had her weaknesses. Sometimes she overthought simple decisions. Sometimes she delayed important tasks. Sometimes she expected too much from herself and became discouraged when she could not meet those expectations.
But perhaps recognising imperfections was itself a beginning.
“Growth does not mean never making mistakes. It means having the courage to recognise them without allowing them to define you.”
She realised that becoming better was not about competing with another person's achievements. It was about taking responsibility for her own life.
She could not change yesterday's decisions, but she could make wiser ones tomorrow.
---
That evening, Inara returned to her notebook.
She wrote about the girl who wanted to achieve everything, the woman who sometimes doubted herself, and the soul that was still learning.
She wrote about people who carried silent disappointments, who smiled despite unfinished dreams, and who sometimes needed reassurance from themselves more than from anyone else.
Then she wrote one final thought:
“Perhaps being imperfect is not our greatest weakness. Perhaps refusing to accept our imperfections is what makes life unnecessarily difficult.”
She looked at the sentence for a long time.
She did not suddenly become confident. Her problems did not disappear, and her dreams did not become easier to achieve.
But something within her had softened.
She understood that she could be grateful and ambitious at the same time. She could acknowledge her mistakes without hating herself for making them. She could want to improve without believing that she was never enough.
She did not need to become a completely different person to begin again.
She only needed to become a little more patient, a little more sincere, and a little more responsible than she had been yesterday.
Before closing her notebook, she added:
“Dear self, forgive the days you were not at your best. Learn from the choices you regret, but do not spend your entire life punishing yourself for being human.”
Outside, the evening settled quietly.
Inara looked towards the fading light and whispered a small prayer.
She still had dreams to pursue, lessons to learn, and imperfections to work on.
She was not finished.
Perhaps she never would be.
And maybe that was the beautiful part of being alive.
Because a soul does not have to be perfect to be worthy of love, and a life does not have to be complete to be meaningful.
She was Inara.
Not the person she had once imagined herself to be.
Not yet the person she hoped to become.
Just a soul still becoming.
---
A MESSAGE TO THE READER
Dear Reader,
Perhaps you, too, have days when you feel disappointed in yourself. Days when you question your abilities, regret your decisions, or wonder why you are not yet the person you always wanted to become.
Please remember that you are human. You will make mistakes, have weaknesses, and experience moments when you fall short of your own expectations.
Do not let your imperfections make you forget your worth. Accept your mistakes, learn from them, and give yourself permission to begin again.
You do not have to have everything figured out. You do not have to achieve everything at once. Some journeys take longer, and some lessons require patience.
Keep your faith in Allah, keep working on yourself, and never confuse being unfinished with being unsuccessful.
You are allowed to be imperfect while becoming better. You are allowed to grow at your own pace.
After all, becoming is not about reaching perfection; it is about never giving up on the person you are still learning to be.
With warmth,
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